


Gilfoyle looks like a ferret who has let himself go

by orphan_account



Category: Silicon Valley (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-16
Updated: 2015-11-16
Packaged: 2018-05-01 23:13:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5224658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>D & G au.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Gilfoyle looks like a ferret who has let himself go

Dinesh Chugtai was used to being the only young man in his neighborhood. It was weird at first, especially to be surrounded by soccer mom types, but it was eventually discovered by the HOA that he was a wonderful gossip. If someone in the area needed to talk shit about someone, Dinesh was their man.

 

It was a consequence of his surroundings that he became invested in the culinary arts. It was simply a handy way to complain to everyone, but he eventually appreciated the process. He enjoyed making complicated cakes and bread, even when everyone left his house. He'd wake up from a frightning dream, and then walk into the kitchen in the middle of the night and bake. Above anything else, he loved to bake pies. Lemon Meringue, Key-lime, pumpkin, cherry, apple, blueberry, concord grape, pecan, rhubarb, and chiffon. Baking had grown from a social activity to something much more... calming. He didn't have much time on his hands, but when he needed too, he would bake.

 

Dinesh was a doctor, he had pursued the dream his parents wanted him too, yet he still felt like he could be doing more with his life. He'd always found technology much more interesting than studying human diseases. Not to mention he'd gotten nightmares in college when he had studied a bit of pathology. But, parents were parents, and Dinesh was a doctor, so he had put away his computer and focused on his job (and the occasional dessert).

 

**********

 

"Hey, so could you bake something for our montly meeting?" Miranda asked. Miranda was the head of the HOA, and was always a flurry of activity in the week leading up to the montly meeting.

 

"Yeah. But what type of dessert do you want? Because I could go in multiple directions," Dinesh said. He didn't really want to bake for these meetings anymore, however, he was also known as the best baker in the neighborhood, and he had to uphold that title. He almost prefered the quiet of the kitchen to having to talk about Linda's groundhog infestation. 

"Oh I don't care, just make it good. Oh, and one more thing. There's some other guy moving into the neighborhood, so make sure it's yummy!" Miranda says, with too much sunshine in her voice.

 

Dinesh walks back to his house and decides to make brownies, specifically because he wanted to get it over with. Anyway, he had a job that he needed to do elsewhere, given that he was a doctor. 

 

**********

 

"Oh hello everyone! I know that you just love our darling neighborhood, and we have a new member! Mr. Bertram Gilfoyle!" Miranda says, too cheerful, yet again. "And... he even brought his own baked goods as well! Now moving on to our first order of buisness, Linda has mentioned multiple times that here groundhog infestation______." Dinesh tuned her out, as he walked to the table with the food on it. Like he did at every party ever. He saw a guy wearing a flannel shirt, and copious amounts of black, standing near a the table. Dinesh doesn't do anything, but grab a slice of German Chocolate cake from the table.

 

This "Bertram" guy stares at him, so Dinesh takes a bite to avoid his gaze. I hope I hate this I hope this is crappy oh my god if this cake is good I will be so mad Dinesh thought. Unfortunately, the opposite happens. The cake is so delicious that Dinesh almost drops his plate in shock. "Bertram" keeps staring him down.

"So. What did you think." Bertram said, more as a statement than a question.

 

"It was... okay?" Dinesh responds. "You didn't sift your flour, which might make it slightly more airy."

 

"Clearly you like to bake," Bertram says.

 

"Yeah. You do too," Dinesh says. "Can I have your recipe?"

 

"That's classified material, however, I would be happy to cook it with you," Bertram says.

 

"It would probably make every single HOA member less likely to force us to hang out. Then I could get back to ratting out Janice for planting groundhogs in Linda's yard. That backstabbing bitch," Dinesh says.

 

"I'll see you then," Bertram replies.

 

**********

 

Dinesh ends up deciding to make a key-lime pie, because it reminds him of Florida, where his sister lives. He starts laying out the ingredients when the door bell rings. He runs and grabs it, letting Bertram inside.

 

"Hey," Bertram says.

 

"Oh, hi Bertram I ____."

 

"I'm going to stop you there. the only people who call me Bertram are my idiotic parents and apparently HOA board members. No one else."

 

"Oh okay... Well then... Gilfoyle, I have ingredients," Dinesh says, leading Gilfoyle into the kitchen.

 

"Yeah. So do I. Your brownies need work. If you had the intelligence to actually recognize when to take the dish out of the oven, it would be better. But instead, we're stuck with hockey pucks," Gilfoyle says.

 

"Oh really, because it seems to me that your German Chocolate cake would be far better if you were to actually choose the cacao percentage in your chocolate before you started baking," Dinesh replies.

 

They end up baking and bantering for the rest of the night, enjoying themselves for a while. Gilfoyle leaves late, and Dinesh sits in the kitchen for a while.

 

*********

 

Dinesh wakes up the next day to a loud rapping on the door. He glances at the clock before getting the door. It’s 1:30 am. He grumbles, and then opens the door.

 

“Hello,” Gilfoyle says. He’s in a bathrobe and boxers with nothing else on. Dinesh shifts uncomfortably. Dinesh somehow feels overdressed, even though he’s just wearing his usual pajama suit.

 

“Do you think it’s cool to just wake up someone when they need 30 more minutes of sleep?” Dinesh scowls. He needed that extra 30 minutes of sleep given that he was up way past his self set bedtime the previous day.

 

“Why do you get up at 2:00 in the morning?” Gilfoyle says. Dinesh shifts on his feet, deciding wether to rant or to give an actual response.

 

“I’m a doctor who has the misfortune of having a really early shift. I hate it, however it makes my parents happy,” he says. Dinesh rubs his eyes in a sleepy haze.

 

“Strange.”

 

“I guess.”

 

“When do you end work?” Gilfoyle asks. Dinesh immediately becomes suspicious. 

 

“12:00. I don’t work at a hospital, so I don’t have to work a 16 hour shift or whatever. I guess I’m lucky. Why?” Dinesh really hopes that Gilfoyle isn’t a serial killer. That would be nice.

 

“Nothing.”

 

“What do you do then?”

 

“I’m a lawyer,” Gilfoyle replies with a straight face. Dinesh tries to hold in a laugh, but ends up cracking up. He can’t stop himself from laughing, and picturing Gilfoyle in a suit was plain hilarious.

 

“You… a lawyer!”

 

“Everyone in my life said that I couldn’t possibly be that smart. And then I kicked their asses as far as jobs go. Plus being a lawyer made my mother super mad. She wanted me to be a pastor so…” Gilfoyle tries to say, between Dinesh’s laughs.

 

“I see.”

 

“Yeah.” Gilfoyle walks back down the driveway.

 

**********

Dinesh walks back into his house after his shift ends, and barely has time to sit down before the doorbell rings. He grabs it, silently cursing his neighbor. Gilfoyle is standing there, holding a pie.

 

“Hello,” Gilfoyle says. He’s dressed with much more clothing, a t-shirt and skinny jeans. Dinesh still can’t picture him as a lawyer.

 

“Why are you at my house again?” Dinesh says, exasperated. It was like rubbing salt into a wound, baking better, and then making Dinesh lose sleep. 

 

“You’re the only person my age and gender here. My house flooded. Where else would I go?” Gilfoyle replies.

 

“You seem like a solitary ferret. Who doesn’t need people,” Dinesh says.  


“Even a solitary ferret has to interact with people occasionally,” Gilfoyle says. Dinesh stares at him for a long time.

 

“Um…” Dinesh says. 

 

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Gilfoyle says as he pushes past Dinesh into the house, and starts setting up his computer.

 

“Fine. Until your house is fixed, then out.” Dinesh says. He starts to clean up his house, which was messier than he would have liked it to be. Books littered the floor everywhere, plus he hadn’t even started on the dishes in the sink. Dinesh lets out a loud sigh.

 

**********

Dinesh and Gilfoyle settle into an uncomfortable rhythm as time progresses. Dinesh gets up and leaves for work, then Gilfoyle gets up and starts on discovery. Dinesh gets home, they chat for a while, and then Gilfoyle goes to his office to talk to other lawyers. Once Gilfoyle gets back, they watch reality TV, and sometimes cook food.

 

One night, this rhythm is broken up when the doorbell rings. Gilfoyle grabs it. A woman who looks like a cross between a bible warehouse owner and a trophy wife is standing there.

 

“Hello,” Gilfoyle says, groggily. 

 

“What do you have to say for yourself?” the woman says. She clearly dislikes Gilfoyle, and appears to be on the verge of a lecture

 

“Why are you here Madeline?” Gilfoyle asks.

 

“Mom wants me to check on you. Also, she forced me to invite you to me wedding,” Madeline says, barging through the door. She forces herself into a chair directly across from Dinesh. Dinesh stares back at her in shock.

 

“Um, who the hell is this?” Madeline asks. 

 

“Dinesh. I guess that we’re kind of roommates right now…” Gilfoyle says, sitting down.

 

“I can’t believe this. You _cannot_ bring your boyfriend to my wedding, let’s be very clear,” Madeline says. She storms out of the house in a whirl of frustration. 

“Who was that?” Dinesh asks, staring at the television screen.

 

“My terrible sister. I hate her. Also, she’s just jealous of the fact that I’ve obviously outdone her. The whole reason I became a lawyer was because she got kicked out of law school. It screws with her head that the most rebellious sibling got what she wanted,” Gilfoyle says.

 

“Okay?” Dinesh does not want to get embroiled in rivalries. At all.

 

“Anyway, we have to go to her wedding as a couple,” Gilfoyle suggests. 

 

“Didn’t she just say that I _shouldn’t_ come?” Dinesh says. He doesn’t want to pretend to be gay just to annoy some people.

 

“My mom will force her to allow you too. Plus I’ll get to annoy like double the people,” Gilfoyle replies. 

 

Dinesh finally agrees to go after Gilfoyle throws in an X Files DVD box set. They resume with their normal schedule, yet Dinesh starts to dread the day of that stupid wedding. At least it was on a Saturday, so he could have work off on the day afterwards.

 

**********

Dinesh and Gilfoyle attend the wedding, and things are uneventful until the reception. Dinesh gets really really drunk and is standing there with Gilfoyle. 

 

“You’re better looking than I thought,” Dinesh says, sitting in a chair. He’s staring at the door for no discernible reason.

 

“Really?” Gilfoyle says, in mock amusement. Dinesh’s head is resting on his chest, and Gilfoyle is looking up.

 

“Actually,” Dinesh says. He must have been really drunk, because the next thing he did was kiss Gilfoyle, straight on the mouth. Gilfoyle leans in, and they sit there for a long time. Dinesh finally shifts away.

 

“I think we should go,” Gilfoyle says. He drives them back to Dinesh’s house, the drive mainly in silence.

 

He opens the door, and tucks Dinesh into bed.

 

**********

Gilfoyle is reading some book when Dinesh opens the door. 

 

“Good morning,” Gilfoyle says, looking up from his reading. He’s sitting on a barstool by the kitchen, eating cereal.

 

“What exactly happened?” Dinesh asks. He tries not to betray insecurity about the whole situation, but it doesn’t works out that way. Dinesh sits down next to Gilfoyle. 

 

“You kissed me. Not much else,” Gilfoyle replies, indifferently.

 

“So that actually happened,” Dinesh says, a little bit alarmed about what had happened.

 

“Yeah,” Gilfoyle replies, indifferently. 

 

“Was it nice?” Dinesh asks. 

 

“On my end, yes. I don’t know about you,” Gilfoyle replies. Dinesh turns, and looks in another direction.

 

“Weird,” Dinesh says. “I never though that I would_______.” Dinesh doesn’t get that far, Gilfoyle cuts him off with a kiss.

 

Dinesh decides he’s fine with it, and sighs. They almost get no work done that day, yet both are completely okay with it.

 


End file.
